The Girl’s Guide to Yoga

I just celebrated my six-year anniversary of practicing yoga. While I started out barely being able to touch my toes, I’ve been blessed to birth quite a few poses on this journey.

As there is the What to Expect When You’re Expecting for mothers-to-be, there are some insights that go beyond any instructions a yoga teacher may offer in class but "yoginis in the making" may need to maneuver their female form and achieve certain postures.

For all you ladies, here are some hints:

The Gynecology View

As great as it is to finally get your ankle, or leg, behind your head … well, it comes with the added perk of getting the same perspective your gynecologist has at your annual visit. You’ll definitely be able to tell if your pants are see through but there is nothing to do but laugh and move your drishti (gaze) somewhere else.

The Ovary Crusher

As men have to navigate crossing their legs in Eagle, balancing our hips on our elbows in Peacock can feel like fertility murder. Tighten your abs as much as possible and tuck your tailbone enough to flatten your lumbar spine. Your muscular core will help to act as a shield, literally.

Hair Entanglement

Whether you’re navigating traditional Headstand or King Pigeon your long locks can be a unforeseen obstacle as they get pulled or are in the way of your grip. I’ve found a looser bun or ponytail is helpful because then you can just move it around depending on what series is called for. If your hairdo is too tight, you’re stuck and class can move on while you’re still fiddling with where to stick your mane. Fluid and free allows flexibility.

Mat Rash

Elbow grease is one thing, scaly forearm flaking is another. It’s just part of the wear-and-tear process as you learn to balance on your forearms for inversions and arm balances. This can result in some light scabbing so try a thick lotion (like Eucerin) at night and know that once you’re solidly balancing this will go away.

Booty This

Transitioning from an inversion to an arm balance can be the best feeling in the world…but then there are times when your caboose feels as heavy as the weight of a freight train. Don’t let this deter you. It can be part of the learning process and you’ll build the strength to get there or there are some days that even the most seasoned practitioner has to give a little more oomph. It’s temporary so keep at it.

Tagged under: Humor, yoga humor
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Jenn Kashiwa is a freelance writer, yogi, and pop-culture enthusiast. She writes about her lessons on learning to live more consciously, wholly, and lovingly on her READ MORE